歌词与中文翻译
Do you find your daughter's friends attractive,
你是不是也觉得你女儿的闺蜜们很有魅力
but know they look at you as just a dad?
却知道她们不过把你看成老爸一辈的人？
Does the typing pool at work think of you more as
是不是办公室的打字员也觉得你像
a teddy bear than a tiger?
可爱的泰迪熊，而不是勇猛的虎王？
Do you whack off in your minivan
你是不是还在面包车里一边自娱自乐
while listening to teen pop?
一边听少女组合助兴？
You know, you'll be dead soon.
你很清楚，你时日无多了
You've missed out on so much.
你开始无比怀念过去的激情岁月
It's not too late to make a change.
想改变吗？现在开始还不晚！
At the Midlife Crisis Center,
在中年危机一站式解决中心
we know you've made a success of yourself.
我们最清楚你是多么成功
Why are you sharing it with others?
为什么要把你靠本事获得的一切拱手他人？
Why not enjoy it while you have the chance?
为什么不抓住机会及时行乐呢？
What's holding you back?
你还在犹豫什么？
Cowardice. We'll get you to
不要当懦夫。我们会带你
the other side of your despair.
逃离绝望的生活
We specialize in real estate, divorce attorneys,
我们是多领域专家，精通房地产、离婚诉讼
mistress placement, plastic surgery,
小三安置、整形手术
hair coloring and replacement,
染发植发
male fur coats, and much more.
男款毛皮大衣，等等等等
With a designer clothing store and
我们还有高档服装店和
sports car dealership on site.
跑车交易行
The Midlife Crisis Center will
来中年危机一站式解决中心
help you rediscover life while you still can.
我们会让你及时焕发人生第二春
Come with your wife, leave with a sports car.
带老婆过来，换辆跑车回去
While you've made a success of yourself,
在你功成名就之时
her chest has gone south.
她的大白兔却越垂越长
How can you have that trollop on your arm
你还能忍受这个泼妇
for a second longer?
哪怕一秒钟吗？
The answer is, you can't.
显然不能
Ignore your children. Take yourself seriously.
孩子们也自生自灭去吧。只有你自己最重要
Visit the Midlife Crisis Center today.
中年危机一站式解决中心，今天就来吧！