Bailout Song #1

This is your bailout, sweetie your bailout

Honey I’m calling to bail you out

You can tell him your dad’s in the hospital

Your building’s on fire

That’s all you need to say

and you’re free on your way

It’s your bestie calling, It’s Reggie to the rescue

Who do save you from another catastrophic blind date

I’ve done it time and again, save you from horrendous men

all those losers who should never be allowed to pro-create

The dentist with the foul breath that make you wanna yak

or that hippie with the hair growing only on his back

or the guy obsessed with disney

second thought, I’ll cut him slack

though his love for princesses was rather suspect

But I’m digressing

I’m obsessing

You did not pick up your cell

which means you either didn’t hear it ring

or things are going well

So e-mail, call or FaceTime tell me if you like this guy

Okay that’s it

I love you lots, need you forever, bye~

This is your bailout, sweetie your bailout

Honey I’m calling to bail you out

You can tell him your grandma broke her hip

or your dog ate some chocolate

That’s all you need to say

and you’re free on your way

Later, bi*ch!