Happy Ending

Hello, how you doing?

I can give you good massage

I can be your everyting, you give me fifty bucks

If you no say nothing, I can give you sucky-sucky

If you give me more money, I give you do something lucky

Hello, how you doing?

I can give you good massage

I can be your everyting, you give me fifty bucks

If you no say nothing, I can give you sucky-sucky

If you give me more money, I give you do something lucky

Yup, just a normal day, on my favorite website, backpage.com

I was scrollin' through hoes, lookin' for a b*tch to f*ck

I’m like, “That babe, uh huh.”

I was just about to call her

Then I saw an ad pop up, I'm like, "Wait, oh my God!"

You see, I had a really long day

And I just could not turn down an Asian massage

So, I called ‘em up and I said

“Hello, when is your next slot available?”

She said, “You can come right now.”

Fuck yeah! “Hurry up, because I’ll wait for you!”

I pulled up and I sat in the waiting room

'Cause this shit all are set up, it's debatable

If I get confronted by the police

I just want a massage, I am not here to break the rules

Then an Asian lady had a pen and told me

“Come over here to the counter!”

Then she ask me if I wanted to get a session

For 30 minutes or an hour

I said, "Hmm uh, I'll take 30

Nah, matter of fact I’ll do an hour, f*ck it."

'Cause I know whatever's 'bout to go on

Behind those doors I’m 'bout to love it

She say, “Usually 50 dollar but for you I do 45.”

I say thank you and gave her the money

Then she say, “Okay, let's go inside!”

I'm like, "Fuck yeah!" – it's about to go down right now

So good what I found right now

I’m about to let it all out right now, yeah

Hello, how you doing?

I can give you good massage

I can be your everyting, you give me fifty bucks

If you no say nothing, I can give you sucky-sucky

If you give me more money, I give you do something lucky

Hello, how you doing?

I can give you good massage

I can be your everyting, you give me fifty bucks

If you no say nothing, I can give you sucky-sucky

If you give me more money, I give you do something lucky

Look, so I walked back to the massage room

She said, “Take your clothes off, and then put this robe on!”

I’m like, "Okay, no prob'."

Oh God, this about to be so fun

And no one even knows; she left, I got undressed

And all the sudden a new Asian girl walked through the door

She said, "Hello, how are you?

I am Muli, that's what you can call me

And I give you lovely Asian massage."

I’ve been waitin' for this all day

I position myself on the table

And put my face down in the circular cushion

And she started massagin' my back

I knew somethin' was up with the way she was lookin'

Then she slid her tiny little finger tips

Down my spine right over my buttcrack

She was massagin' my booty

Then go to my thighs and start touchin' my nutsack

Fuck yeah!

Then I put a little bitty sway in my hips to let her know I like it

Somethin' was 'bout to go down

You can see it a mile away, you don't have to be psychic

She said, "You want someting?”

I said, “Yes I do.”

She said, “You big strong man, I really like you!”

I said, “I like you too.”

Then she said, “You want the hand, sucky, fucky?

Tell me right now 'cause I need to know!”

I said “I’ll have all three of those”

Then I thought ooh she a little freaky ho

She said, “I give it to you for cheap, you give me 125 dollar”

I said, “Okay, here you go!”

Lowkey I was feelin' kinda awkward

She jacked me off and gave me my top first

I stayed quiet as I watched her

My d*ck had a strong posture

She said, “You very big like a monster!”

She got naked then I humped her

I’m lovin' this little tiny Asian booty,

I swear that this girl is the best

I’m buildin' a sweat, I’m killin' it yes

I pulled out and spilled on her breast

Everything was just right

I hit the hour on the deadline

I guess I’m gonna leave now

She said, “That's fine, thank you, come again next time!”

Hello, how you doing?

I can give you good massage

I can be your everyting, you give me fifty bucks

If you no say nothing, I can give you sucky-sucky

If you give me more money, I give you do something lucky

Hello, how you doing?

I can give you good massage

I can be your everyting, you give me fifty bucks

If you no say nothing, I can give you sucky-sucky

If you give me more money, I give you do something lucky

Hey, no shame in my game, buddy

If you lookin' for me, you know where to find me

At an Asian massage parlor

Because when the times get rough, a happy ending is necessary

Hahaha

Oh yeah – strap up, kids! It’s important