Can You Do Me a Kindness?

I don't go outside as much as I used to

I'm not home, just in my house forgetting myself or at least trying to

But not forgiving unti l come back out

I have a light on in my room

During the day I hardly notice it

But at night it keeps me from falling asleep

I have this dream of knowing you

During the day I hardly notice it

But at night it keeps me from all other dreams

The numbing of time taught me how to finally fall asleep

I just wish you'd come home and teach me how to wake back up

This is torture, this is truth, this is unfamiliar pain

This is following an ache but this is love

There's a railroad track behind my house

At night I can hear freight being taken to retail

But I'm still not sold on letting myself out

I never knew it was cold until I knew how the heat felt

You were always warm when put in warm place

But I was too shallow to contain the same flame

There's a nicotine patch on my night stand

You never did quit but at least you tried

Or maybe you did but I never saw you lift a cigarette to your lips

I was preoccupied looking into my reflection and the way you said you felt alive

Your infection inflects the walls each night

And the shades of color are all black and white

Just like your goodbye

You said to stop letting your love consume my mind

I never did quit but at least you tried

I don't go outside as much as I used to

I'm not home, I'm just trying to sleep at night

Forgetting your love or at least trying to

You said goodbye, now just say goodnight