A Cold, Cold Christmas

A Cold Cold Christmas -Stephen Colbert

I want a cold cold Christmas

I hope it's 20below

Let a winter's storm bury all that's warm

In a bone chilling blanket of snow

Thought you would love me forever

Turns out you wanted to part

Now I want a cold cold Christmas

To go with your cold cold heart

Oh I want a cold cold Christmas

One that's bitter and barren and bleak

Where the weather's fowl

And the West wind's howl

And the sun doesn't shine for a week

You hung up my heart like a stocking

Then went and stuffed it with coal

Now I want a cold cold Christmas

To gnaw at the depths of your soul

I'll be alone this Christmas

You'd think it would cut like a knife

But I'm numb inside

Cause a part of me's died

From the frostbite you've spread on my life

Darling Christmas with you

I used to love it so

We trade presents

And kiss beneath the mistletoe

I said I loved you and

You said you loved me too

Remember

I said I loved you

And you said you loved me too

Those days are over now but

I still want you to know

Even though I'm not the one

You'll be kissing beneath that mistletoe

I'll be thinking of you every minute

On this day of love and cheer

And every minute

Of every other day of the year

I'm serious

So cold that it pierces your body

So cold that it hurts every breath

In fact I wouldn't mind

If you woke up to find

Your new man had frozen to death

So go have a cold cold Christmas

A blustery landscape of pain

Though I'm warm in my skin

I'm still snowed in

By the blizzard that fell in my brain

Only a week until New Year

That's when I'll make a new start

But first comes a cold cold Christmas

To go with your cold cold heart

Your frozen

Nasty

Heart