Salome

NORMA: Now go

JOE: Next time I'll bring my autograph album

NORMA: Just a minute, you.

Did you say you were a writer?

JOE: That's what it says on my guild card

NORMA: And you've written pictures?

JOE: Sure have. Would you like to see my credits?

NORMA: Come over here. I want to ask you something.

Just what sort of length is a movie script these days?

JOE: Depends

NORMA: I wrote this. It's a very important picture

JOE: Look like six very important pictures

NORMA: It's for DeMille to direct

JOE: Oh, yeah? And will you be in it?

NORMA: Of course. What do you think?

JOE: Just asking. I didn't know you were planning a comeback

NORMA: I hate that word. It's a return

JOE: Well...fair enough

NORMA: I want you to read it

JOE: You shouldn't let another writer read your stuff. He may steal it

NORMA: I'm not afraid. Sit down.

Max! Bring something to drink

MAX: Yes, Madame

NORMA: I said sit down! It's about Salome.

Salome - the story of a woman.

The woman who was all women

NORMA: Salome, what a woman, what a part!

Innocent body and a sinful heart

Inflaming Herod's lust

But secretly loving a holy man

No one could play her like I can

JOE: Well, I had nothing urgent coming up

I thought I might as well skim it

It's fun to see how bad bad writing can be

This promised to go to the limit

NORMA: There's so many great scenes, I can't wait

A boiling cauldron of love and hate

She toys with Herod

'Til he's putty in her hands

He reels tormented through the desert sands

JOE: It sure was a real cheery set-up

The wind wheezing through that organ

Max shuffling around and a dead ape dumped on a shelf

And her staring like a Gorgon

NORMA: They drag the Baptist up from the jails

She dances the dance of the seven veils

Herod says "I'll give you anything"

JOE: Now it was time for some comedy relief

The guy with the baby casket

Must have seen a thing or two, that chimp

Shame it was too late to ask it

NORMA: Have you got to the scene where she asks for his head?

If she can't have him living

She'll take him dead

They bring in his head on a silver tray

She kisses his mouth - it's a great screenplay!

JOE: It got to be eleven, I was feeling ill

What the hell was I doing?

Melodrama and sweet champagne

And a garbled plot from a scrambled brain

But I had my own plot brewing

JOE: Just how old is Salome?

NORMA: Sixteen

JOE: I see

NORMA: Well?

JOE: It's fascinating

NORMA: Of course it is

JOE: Could be it's a little long

Maybe the opening's wrong

But it's extremely good for a beginner

NORMA: No, it's a perfect start

I wrote that with my heart

The river-bank, the baptist, and the sinner

JOE: Shouldn't there be some dialogue?

NORMA: I can say anything I want with my eyes

JOE: It could use a few cuts

NORMA: I will not have it butchered!

JOE: I'm not talking limb from limb

I just mean a little trim

All you need is someone who can edit

NORMA: I want someone with a knack

Not just any studio hack

And don't think for a moment I'd share credit!

NORMA: When were you born?

JOE: December 21st, why?

NORMA: I like Sagittarians. You can trust them

JOE: Thanks

NORMA: I want you to do this work

JOE: Me? Gee, I don't know, I'm busy.

I just finished one script and I'm about to start a new assignment

NORMA: I don't care

JOE: I'm pretty expensive. I get five hundred a week

NORMA: Don't you worry about money. I'll make it worth your while

JOE: Well, it's getting kind of late

NORMA: Are you married, Mr. -

JOE: The name is Gillis. Single

NORMA: Where do you live?

JOE: Hollywood. Alto Nido Apartments

NORMA: You'll stay here

JOE: I'll come back early tomorrow

NORMA: Nonsense, there's a room over the garage. Max will take you there. Max!

MAX: Yes, Madame

NORMA: Take Mr. Gillis to the guest room.

We'll begin at nine sharp

JOE: Now this is more like it

MAX: I made up the bed this afternoon

JOE: Thanks. How did you know I was going to stay?

MAX: There's soap and a toothbrush in the bathroom

JOE: She's quite a character, isn't she, that Norma Desmond?