Let’s Generalize About Men

Right now we’re angry and sad

It’s our right to get righteously mad

At every member of the opposite ***

Oh god, we hate them

Let’s not distinguish between them at all

Let’s just drink a lot more alcohol

And then high five each other as we make a bunch of blanket statements

Let’s generalize about men

Let’s generalize about men

Let’s take one bad thing about one man

And apply it to all of them

Let’s conflate all the guys

Let’s generalize about men

All men are completely repressed

Uh-huh

All men only want to have ***

There are no exceptions, all three billion men are like this

All 3.6 billion men

All men are emotionally stunned

When asked how they feel every man’s always grunted

And why do men never listen and only think about themselves,

as opposed to women who always listen and never think about themselves

Oh, I hear you, girl

Let’s generalize about men

Let’s generalize about men

Let’s get super lit, and not admit

this is some kind of primal ritual we need now and then

Maybe our spirits will rise if we generalize about men

All men are stupid and childish

Even the ones who are "smart and mature"

All every man does every day

is watch porn, eat wings, burp, fart, and snore

Wait, what about gay men?

Oh, no, they are fine.

Gay men are all really great

Every single one

They’re never mean, just sassy

They’re all completely adorable and fun

So let’s focus for now on straight men

Let’s just generalize about them

They’re all monsters.

They’re murderers.

They’re rapists.

Totally.

Wait, I have sons!

Your sons are gonna be rapists