A Little Priest

(Lovett)That's all very well, but what we gonna do about him

(Todd)Later on when it's dark

We'll take it to some secret place and bury it

(Lovett)Oh, yeah, course we could do that

Don't suppose he's got any relatives

that's gonna come poking around looking for him

Seems a downright shame

(Todd)Shame?

(Lovett)Seems an awful waste

Such a nice plump frame, what's his name has

Had, has, nor it can't be traced

Business needs a lift, debts to be erased

Think of it as thrift, as a gift, if you get my drift

Seems an awful waste

I mean, with the price of meat, what it is

When you get it, if you get it

(Todd)Ah

(Lovett)Good, you got it

Take for instance, Mrs. Mooney and her pie shop

Business never better using only ********* and toast

Now a *****'s good for maybe six or seven at the most

And I'm sure they can't compare as far as taste

(Todd)Mrs. Lovett, what a charming notion, eminently practical

(Todd)And yet appropriate as always/(Lovett)Well, it does seem a waste

(Todd)Mrs. Lovett, how I've lived without you, all these years I'll never know

(Lovett)Think about it...

(Todd)How delectable!/(Lovett)...lots of other gentlemen'll...

(Lovett)...soon be coming for a shave/(Todd)Also undetectable

(Lovett)Won't they? Think of all them pies!/(Todd)How choice! How rare!

(Todd)For what's the sound of the world out there?

(Lovett)What, Mr. Todd, what, Mr. Todd, what is that sound?

(Todd)Those crunching noises pervading the air

(Lovett)Yes, Mr. Todd, yes, Mr. Todd, yes, all around

(Todd)It's man devouring man, my dear

(Together)And who are we to deny it in here?

(Todd)These are desperate times, Mrs. Lovett

And desperate measures are called for

(Lovett)Here we are, hot out of the oven

(Todd)What is that?

(Lovett)It's priest, have a little priest

(Todd)Is it really good?

(Lovett)Sir, it's too good, at least

Then again they don't commit sins of the flesh

So it's pretty fresh

(Todd)Awful lot of fat

(Lovett)Only where it sat

(Todd)Haven't you got poet or something like that?

(Lovett)No, you see, the trouble with poet is how do you know it's deceased?

Try the priest

Lawyer's rather nice

(Todd)If it's for a price

(Lovett)Order something else, though, to follow

Since no one should swallow it twice

(Todd)Anything that's lean?

(Lovett)Well, then, if you're British and loyal

You might enjoy Royal Marine

Anyway, it's clean

Though, of course it tastes of wherever it's been

(Todd)Is that squire on the fire?

(Lovett)Mercy no, sir, look closer you'll notice it's grocer

(Todd)Looks thicker, more like vicar

(Lovett)No, it has to be grocer, it's green

(Todd)The history of the world, my love...

(Lovett)Save a lot of graves, do a lot of relatives favors

(Todd)...is those below serving those up above

(Lovett)Everybody shaves, so there should be plenty of flavors

(Todd)How gratifying for once to know

(Together)That those above will serve those down below!

(Todd)What is that?

(Lovett)It's fop, finest in the shop

Or we have some shepherd's pie peppered with actural shepherd on top

And I've just begun

Here's the politician, so oily it's served with a doily, have one

(Todd)Put it on a bun

Well, you never know if it's going to run

(Lovett)Try the friar, fried, it's drier

(Todd)No, the clerge is really too coarse and too mealy

(Lovett)Then actor, it's compacter

(Todd)But always arrives overdone

I'll come again when you have Judge on the menu

Have charity towards the world, my pet

(Lovett)Yes, yes, I know, my love

(Todd)We'll take the customers that we can get

(Lovett)High-born and low, my love

(Todd)We'll not discriminate great from small

No, we'll serve anyone

(Lovett)We'll serve anyone/(Todd)Meaning anyone

(Together)And to anyone at all!