Worship What I Hate

I keep looking at myself in the mirror

Hoping it will change

And I keep wishing for a brand-new body

That I didn't have to blame

I'm seeing every flaw, like a failure

I'm using every cure, like a savior

Like trying to build a church out of all my hurt

When it really needs grace

I gave all my time to nothing

I focused on who I was

Not who I'm becoming

My fears they took up space

My eyes couldn't look away

I didn't even realize

I worshiped what I hate

Half a bottle of red

Just before bed

Is the only way I dream

Before I really wake up

The first thing I touch is a button on a screen

I'm not guilty of leaving, not sticking around

I'm guilty of staying and just checking out

Yeah, I kept my head down and really missed out

On what's in front of me

'Cause I gave all my time to nothing

I focused on who I was

Not who I'm becoming

My fears they took up space

My eyes couldn't look away

I didn't even realize

I worshiped what I hate

Why do the lies feel like the truth?

Why do I do the things I do?

Why do I fight so hard to keep my heart empty?

'Cause I gave so much time to nothing

I focused on who I was

Not who I'm becoming

My fears they took up space

My eyes couldn't look away

I didn't even realize

I worshiped what I hate

I didn't even realize (Realize)

I didn't even realize (Realize)

I didn't even realize

I worshiped what I hate

Didn't even realize

I worshiped what I hate

Didn't even realize, no

Didn't even realize, didn't know

Mmm, yeah