United Breaks Guitars

I flew United Airlines On my way to Nebraska

The plane departed Halifax Connecting in Chicago’s O’Hare.

While on the ground the passenger Said from the seat behind me,

My God, they’re throwing guitars out there!”"

The Band and I exchanged a look best described as terror,

At the action on the tarmac and knowing whose projectiles these would be.

So before I left Chicago,I alerted three employees,

Who showed complete indifference towards me.

United, United,

You broke my Taylor Guitar.

United, United,

Some big help you are.

You broke it, you should fix it.

You’re liable, just admit it.

I should have flown with someone else or gone by car,

Cause United Breaks Guitars.

When we landed in Nebraska,I confirmed what I’d suspected:

My Taylor’d been the victim of a vicious act of malice at O’Hare.

And so began a year-long saga of pass the buck, “Don’t ask me,”

And “I’m sorry sir, your claim can go no where.”

So to all the airline’s people from New York to New Delhi,

Including kind Ms. Irlweg, who says the final word from them is "no"

I’ve heard all your excuses and I’ve chased your wild gooses,

And this attitude of yours I say must go.

United, United,

You broke my Taylor Guitar.

United, United,

Some big help you are.

You broke it, you should fix it.

You’re liable, just admit it.

I should have flown with someone else or gone by car,

Cause United Breaks Guitars.

Well I won’t say that I’ll never fly With you again

cause maybe to save the world I probably would

But that won’t likely happen.

And if it did, I wouldn’t bring my luggage,

Cause you’d just got and break it Into a thousand pieces

Just like you broke my heart.

When United breaks guitars.

United, United,

You broke my Taylor Guitar

United, United,

Some big help you are.

You broke it, you should fix it.

You’re liable, just admit it.

I should have flown with someone else or gone by car,

Cause United breaks guitars.

Yeah, United breaks guitars.

Yeah, United breaks guitars.