Julia Stiles

Julia Stiles, I got

Julia Stiles, I got

Hello matey it's me, the so shapely overweighty fat ****

I'm ice-cream cone crazy

Oreo tasting, my father don't praise me

With a beach ball gut like I carry my own baby

Skin so flakey like a painting in the Louvre (true)

Socially awkward, I'm strange and I'm aloof

They made me in a petrie dish, raised me in a tube

Now I'm driving round the city with a lady in my boot (let me out)

Innately I'm frustrating, just a vacant kinda dude

Go walking like I'm Walter, wake up naked in a fugue

Too many buegs and I'm slower than the YouTube sloth

Want to **** with me? You do not

I'm fat, you should see me with my muumuu off

Now rappers want to kiss me where my do-do was

See I smuggled in some googs in my Fubu socks

Catch me going ******* mental in a Bluejuice mosh

Julia Stiles, I got

Julia Stiles, I got

Julia Stiles, I got

(So I can go on?)

It's the fat **** boy with the flabby gut

Breathing down the phone, you're like go away, I'm hanging up

But can he bust quicker than a junkie with his bally up

Been days since smacking up, don't even get me angry, punk

See I'm frustrating myself to be around me

I'm like a twelvie towny, a real freaking downy

Found me in your driveway, just tryna key your Audi

Wake up crying in a sweat from a dream of Bieber drowning

Astoundingly disgusting, there's really nothing there

In my brain, so deranged, I feel pain punching air

Cause I can't mow the lawn and the neighbours love to stare

And my dad's like, "yeah, you gotta grow a ******* pair"

And my life is Solitaire but I'm too dumb for cards

Too hyper for Monopoly, I'm too drunk for bars

More obese than Toadie, got a humongous arse

Tryna **** all the time like I'm Susan and Karl

I hate the way you talk to me, and the way you cut your hair

I hate the way you drive my car, I hate it when you stare

I hate your big dumb combat boots and the way you read my mind

I hate you so much it makes me sick, it even makes me rhyme

I hate it, I hate the way you're always right, I hate it when you lie

I hate it when you make me laugh, even worse when you make me cry

I hate it when you're not around, and the fact that you didn't call

But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you, not even close

Not even a little bit, not even at all