Hangman

This a warnin' for the ones who say they aren't afraid

Lately I've been comin' from a darker place

I've been dealin' with depression, I'm more dangerous than ever

I've been drinkin' again and never felt better

I swear to God that I'ma burn a bridge and piss on the flames

Mix the ash with some whiskey and spit it all in they face

My new girl probably flip if you've got somethin' to say

She reminds me of myself when I would drink everyday

I used to feel like how I felt was just a temporary phase

But now I feel like the feelings are ******' feeding off fame

And I don't plan to slow down or give it a second to breathe

I push the pedal past the breaking point, I'm pickin' up speed

In 2016, swear I came apart at the seams

I was scared of the dark and therefore afraid of my dreams

But I rebuilt what came apart with iron alloy and beams

Come fly a plane into my legs and I won't fall to my knees

Haven't taken any pills to calm me down for a month

I'm on the edge and I'm waiting for any reason to jump

Don't take it lightly, I'm excited when they throwin' a punch

I got a list of different strategies to bury these bums

Very rarely do I carry all the weight of a grudge

But I been barely ordinary since the prairies and drugs

My imaginary friends in camouflage with some guns

And I've been fairly military but my army is one

They've been passive aggressive with how the deal with my message

They lack the passion and reckless nature of truthful expression

They ain't made of what I'm made from,

They been bruised up and dented

They don't understand the underhanded ruthless obsession

That I was born with, slammed like the door sticks

Closet full of skeletons,

So heavy couldn't move them with a forklift

Your ***** probably fell in love 'cause you forced it

Now she bump my records while you deep inside a porn binge

I woke up with a buzzin' in my head

I don't wanna leave the comfort of my bed

A dozen missed calls from a dozen of my friends

And my day just started but it's comin' to an end

Already gettin' dark, wake up with the stars

I don't even know how I got home after I left the bar, yeah

I did eight months sober, and I hate that it's over

But the weight on my shoulder started breakin' my heart

I started out with one or two, and then I moved to three or four

And then I realized that I was back where I had been before

Ativan's gone missin' from the bottle

Tell my doctor they were stolen,

But I know that they were swallowed

Everything I ever did was always done with open throttles

All the way or nothin', non-commitment is a broken promise

And I know that that's a problem in itself

But you're livin' or you're dyin' or you're cryin' out for help, yeah

It's been a week since I've felt like me

I've been starvin' but I just can't eat

I'm exhausted but I can't find sleep,

It's been harder than it's ever been

The darkness hasn't ever dimmed, the light's so bleak

I never understood what they meant when they said they were just

The shadows of men that they had been before they were beat

Now I know that everything I heard was for real

When I'm lookin' in the mirror at a shell of myself

I think that stress is a contributing factor

The bein' 28 and feelin' older than dad does

The wrinkles on my face spreadin' faster and faster

If the good die young, I hope I'm one of the bad ones

The day's long, stay strong and try again tomorrow though

Even if you're runnin' out of reasons to ignore the phone

Even if you're runnin' out of gas, go and borrow more

Your demons knock the hardest

When you finally chose to close the door

This not the way my parents raised me

I hope they realize they didn't fail one of their babies

This is the result of a declining social climate

That's original design was keepin' people trapped inside it

Liquor and violence, we suffer in silence

Until we embrace one another and find our collective defiance

Will topple the giants, I just try to smile though the cryin'

'Cause I know that someone,

Somewhere's, feelin' way worse than I am

And that's true (that's true, that's true)