Memoirs

frustrated by failure, failure to communicate i just want to give up throw in the towel, let it all slip away every things become a filthy version of what it once was

I'm disgusted by my waning passion and my embrace for guilt retrospect brings regret but for now

I'm shutting it all out just expect nothing less to be filled with self loathing and doubt this potent sting of remorse is killing me because retrospect brings regret from now on

I'm shutting it all out i guess i lied when i said id die trying so it would seem that

I'm better off lying in a pool of misery in the nearest reaches of despair because

I've reached rock bottom clutching memories making sure

I've got them and if nothing more ill take them to my ******* grave

I've given all i can and i cant give anymore been screaming "****!" for so long my throat is blood and raw and letting it slip away is something that i thought id never do looking back at the photographs to see the difference was in my eyes i must have lost something along the way, used to turn anger to drive but my eyes are open to reality

I'm through asking questions like "why me?"

I'm ******* done and

I'm admitting defeat and i wouldn't have it any other way i wouldn't have it any other way, no one else can control me and when i looked back i realized the difference was in my eyes and now that

I've come to terms with the relentlessness of misery and recaptured the urgent feelings of despair i feel whole again, whole again in the emptiness and that is something i will both despise and cherish. with every fiber of my being coming to terms with the misery coming to terms with the relentlessness and thats something i will despise with every fiber of my being coming to terms with the misery coming to terms with the relentlessness and thats something i will cherish and

I'll do it with the greatest sincerity