It's a Big Old Goofy World

Up in the morning

Work like a dog

Is better than sitting

Like a bump on a log

Mind all your manners

Be quiet as a mouse

Some day you'll own a home

That's as big as a house

I know a fella

He eats like a horse

Knocks his old balls

Round the old golf course

You oughta see his wife

She's a cute little dish

She smokes like a chimney

And drinks like a fish

There's a big old goofy man

Dancing with a big old goofy girl

Ooh baby

It's a big old goofy world

Now elvis had a woman

With a head like a rock

I wished i had a woman

That made my knees knock

She'd sing like an angel

And eat like a bird

And if i wrote a song

She'd know ever single word

Kiss a little baby

Give the world a smile

If you take an inch

Give 'em back a mile

Cause if you lie like a rug

And you don't give a damn

You're never gonna be

As happy as a clam

So i'm sitting in a hotel

Trying to write a song

My head is just as empty

As the day is long

Why it's clear as a bell

I should have gone to school

I'd be wise as an owl

Stead of stubborn as a mule.