The Lighter Side of Dating

Monster multispeed vibrator

Eveready PP3

Coffee, ginseng, percolator

Love cream and vitamin E

Get hip, unzip your lip and flip out now

Allow your jowl a howl and rip out now

Miss Universe is not averse

To *****uality

I think abortion is a caution

And I like to ski

Arab strap, 10" erection

Vacuum pumps and padded pants

Carrot juice for the complexion

Stud 100, chocolate ants

Get smart, and start to tart your heart with art

Spread out your head and educate your parts

Miss Solar System, when asked to list them

Said she had no men

I'm still a virgin, with no urge in

Vote for my hymen

Karma Sutra, Perfumed Garden

Shave the legs to smooth from rough

Esteé Lauder, Chanel, Arden

Eyebrow pencil, powder puff

Get high, untie your thigh and fly, Lotte

Submerge in a dirge and emerge potty

In silver bells and little else

I wiggle and I sway

I'll either be a Penthouse Pet

Or an easy lay