Meanest Man

Meanest Man - Billy Bragg

If the folks next door to me wasn't so good

I'd do all the mean things anybody could

I'd drink and I'd gamble and I'd louse around

I'd be the meanest man in this whole town

If I hadn't seen the light in that old ladys eyes

I'd try to be a man that you would hate and despise

I'd rave and I'd rant and I'd scream and yell

And I'd chase all my neighbours from here to hell

If I hadn't heard those kI'ds laugh playing games

I'd have nervous fits and I'd go insane

I'd turpentine cats and tin can dogs

And I'd smother people to death insI'de of holler logs

If the people around me wasn't so nice

I'd freeze my heart into a cake of ice

I'd steal money from soldiers and working folks too

I'd lend you a dollar and take back two

If my wife dI'dnt kiss me the way she does

I'd carry four or five daggers and three or four guns

I'd shoot craps and ramble and hang out late

And I'd steal baby buggies and cadillac eights

If my friends dI'dnt write me those letters I get

I'd get to be a dictator and be the worse one yet

I'd be the only smart bird and youd all be fools

All I'd send you all away to war

And I'd set home and rule

If it wasn't for them songs I hear all of you sing

I'd put a crown on my dome and I'd say Im your king

I'd kI'dnap some and blackmail others

I'd peddle black market stuff and rob sisters and brothers

If it wasn't for your talking I hear along the street

I'd be the oneriest man that you ever dI'd meet

I'd preach the gospel of hate and I'd drink your blood

But I can't be this bad because my folks are too good

But I can't be this bad because my folks are too good

I'd preach the gospel of hate and I'd drink your blood