Tune Into The Madness

(!WARNING FOR THE VIDEO!)

(a horrorable song by tne Stupendium & Dan Bull)

Good evening

Do you know any good monsters?

Did you ever swerve your car in today's top speed of 35 miles an hour into an automobile?

Do you ever do the dishes for your wife? I should say "Not"

Mrs Carter donesn't really mind

Washing her teflon-coated pans

New

Vital

And fashionable!

Fond of children?

"Well its only natural"

Yes.You can't get away from it

There are branches everywhere

And it's safe?

Yes.Sir!

Dan Bull:

Deep down down

Between the trees

Nestled in the leaves

Gleams a TV screen

Near a small lad

Sitting in the tall grass

the Stupendium:

It's an odd transmission

To be broadcast

Dan Bull:

Listen as we talk dark thoughts

And soar past the watershed line

Before your bedtime

You'll panic like a rabbit

That is caught in headlights

the Stupendium:

Reckon we're manic?

Dan Bull:

Of course

You're DEAD RIGHT

You better exercise

More caution next time

Or you'll end up

In tomorrow morning's headlines

Obituary nothing more than

the Stupendium:

"Born and then Died"

Dan Bull:

And not a single family member

Or a friend cried

ALL:

Tune into the madness

Tune into the madness once more

Tune into the madness

Tune into the madness,ENCORE!

TV:

This remarkable offer

The first and only one of its kind

Delicious

Nutritious

Breakfast cereals

SHOT FROM GUNS!

YES.SIR!

You could buy eight additional teaspoons!

the Stupendium:

Oh look who's come for tea!

Are you sitting comfortably?

Dan Bull:

All of the children

Better sit still then

'Cause when little kiddies fidget

THEN I KILL THEM!

the Stupendium:

Class is now in session

Time you learned your lesson

Stare into the glare

Until your mind is effervescent

Bubbling the troubling

You'll find it less depressing

Open up your eyes

You'll be surprised what you might let in

Dan Bull:

The violent and the tragic

Hiding in the static

the Stupendium:

This silent,enigmatic child

Had better pack it in!

Dan Bull:

And leave the schedule to the grown-ups

the Stupendium:

Revel in the pestilence

Auntie beeb throws up

TV:

As a result of long continuing research

In commercial explosives

Pepsodent's new,improved formula

Cleans teeth whiter than ever

"It certainly does"

ALL:

Tune into the madness

Pictures hand-picked to be sickening.Queasy

Tune into the madness

Transfixed and bewitched by the flickering TV

Dan Bull:

Hold up

Don't touch that dial

Look at our isle of muck and bile

With a saviour clad in a paper bag

That must be one ugly child

the Stupendium:

Gaze into the space

Between the pixels on the screen

There you'll see a place

Between the signal and the screams

Dan Bull:

Feel the oscillation

Of the crystal in your dreams

All:

Just switch off your brain

And let it sizzle in the beams

the Stupendium:

These scenes some viewers

May find disturbing

Dan Bull:

Violent and unnerving

the Stupendium:

Frighteningly alluring

Dan Bull:

Slightly stomach-churning

the Stupendium:

Why would you be turning over?!

Oh.So many programmes!

For discerning viewers

Who are just like you

Dan Bull:

Eyes locked to the box

For the schlock like glue

Shambling in their droves

Scrambling their lobes

the Stupendium:

Get mangled in the strobe

Till you're cross-eyed too

TV:

Here's a message to millions of people

Who are continually pale and washed-out

Weak and run-down

"All I do is bring you pounds and pounds of baby food"

Good,lean butcher's steak

Very satisfying cake

Impress this fact upon mother

Boys and girls have overactive oil glands

"Don't say it like that

You'll make her sound ungainly"

ALL:

Tune into the madness

Tubes swimming with miasmic blackness

Tune into the madness

Sit glued to your viewing apparatus

Dan Bull:

IZZY！

the Stupendium:

WIZZY!

All:

Let's get BUSY!!

Dan Bull:

Such a pity diddy kiddies threw a tizzy

the Stupendium:

Don't be silly

What's the trouble,little Timmy?

Itty bitty nippers

Should be giddy for the TV!

Dan Bull:

Strange lights are disguised

In the bright glare

Daytime television's

Hellish in the right mindset

Too much time staring

Will make your eyes square

the Stupendium:

Any more,you'll end up like that child there

Dan Bull:

Can't toggle off the gogglebox

the Stupendium:

So pop another bottle top

Dan Bull:

Top up your cup and sup the propaganda

the Stupendium:

Prost!

Mazel Tov!

Dan Bull:

They say it's challenging to break a daily habit

Pacified into paralysis

A state of telly addicts

the Stupendium:

Maybe one day the cathode rays'll be chromatic

Bringing colour to the pallor

Of the faces in the static

Dan Bull:

Taking off the mask

My behaviour is erraic

the Stupendium:

Claiming to be sane

But I'm just asymptomatic

Wait,did you hear that?

Dan Bull:

Someone's pacing in the attic

All:

What in the blazes could be making such a racket?

Dan Bull:

OOOH,I say

You gave me a fright there

I think I'm having another little nightmare

ALL:

Tune into the madness

Urchins channel surfing and subservient to the sadness

Zoom in with the cameras

Squirming as the sermon's stirred into your hippocampus

TV:

CREAM

Not a soap

Not a liquid

But a dainty cream

It covers everything easily and beautifully

And what an eyeful ther're going to get

Dan Bull:

FEAST YOUR EYES

Till you're anaesthetised

the Stupendium:

Lead a peaceful life

For the cheapest price

No need to seek advice

Dan Bull:

Or plea to Jesus Christ

In the deep of night

YOU'LL REALLY SEE THE LIGHT

No one observes just how ominous

The world is when monotonous

the Stupendium:

Channelling the brightest minds

Until they turn witless and punderous

Dan Bull:

Their aleryness is interred

In this infernalest sarcophagus

the Stupendium:

The absurd and the preposterous

Burned in by the phosphorus

Uncertain what lurks

Under the surface of your consciousness?

Observe it and you'll learn

That it's PERTURBING

SICK and MONSTROUS

Keep surfing through diversions

UMA Thurman's new detergint

Normal service will return

After a word from our sponsors

TV:

Ladies.What's your problem?

"Gracious!I've nothing for the Johnsons yet!"

Keep clam folks

Buy the gifts that will look more expensive than they are!

200 different formulations of dynamite

So powerful that it'll kill a rat

Press this secret button right here

And an authentic western pistol pops out and fires!

ALL:

Tune into the madness(yEs!)

A bountiful lineup of schooling and comedy(WoOO!)

Huge wins at the baftas

Bound to be prizes when you're every nominee

tunE inTo THe mAdnesS(GaA!)

TuNE IntO tHe MadneSs onCe mORe

tUnE iNto ThE mADNEsS(eAAa!)

TUNE INTO THE MADNESS,ENCORE!

TV:

No guest is ever really happy

Without the right kind of tea

Well don't keep staring at it(HaHaHa..)

Taste it!

Getting high on life could be habit forming

You just can't grow up fast enough can you?

(ThE eND)