The Double Life

At the top of the stairs is a locked room

My secret chamber that no outsider views

For entry is forbidden

Prohibited

Behind this door is my other self

Not a picture in a frame nor a fresh disguise

But my other self

Immobile, inert and sanguine

My narcissus kisses exhale crimson breath

And pump ruby to the lip

I stand before myself not Jekyll nor Hyde

Not sibling nor twin separated at birth

I stand before myself

Unaccountable

I dreamt that I had feet of clay

I dreamt I crossed the seven seas

And when I woke not knowing

I knew I led the double life

All I ever needed is twice removed

I spit my bile in an airless temper

In this vacuum - a vampire reversed

This one who breathes life into me

And even dull mirrors reflect the tarnished twosome

I stand before myself not another me

Not doppelgänger nor witless clone

I stand before myself unrepentant

I dreamt of sin and aftermath

I dreamt of centuries laid bare

And when I woke not knowing

I knew I led the double life