Heir Gordon (Album Version)

Heir Gordon

There was a young man name Arthur Gordon

Heir to a large family fortune

Walking around all prissy and full of himself

Pissing money and showing his wealth

Built a little shrine to the Gordon name

Hyped it from his front-row seat at all the games

Opened a restaurant and called it guess what?

Arthur's, of course, he did strut his stuff

Heir Gordon

Born on a mountaintop in Tennessee

Heir, Heir Gordon

His life sure looks good to me

Got a little brylcreem, a dab will do

Droppin' funny acid, a tab or two

Wearing undergarments from a Mormom friend

Touching all the bases 'round the Cub Scout den

Heir Gordon

Got a lot of money but he ain't worth a damn

Heir, Heir Gordon

Makes me feel just like a man

Why's he doing all these things for me